The Cranky Language Lady: Wednesday Grammar Quiz for Grownups

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Grammar Quiz #30: Spellcheck Isn't Perfect

Spell check improves all the time, but it’s not perfect. It may highlight words that really are words but that are used incorrectly—or it may not. For example, it won’t pick up all the errors in the following passage. Can you?


“Ewe our the apple of my I,” said Clarence. “Its plane to sea that I am looking at the most beautiful woman on the planet, and I love you.” He continued to stair at her over there read whine.
“Okay,” said Doreen with out mush enthusiasm. She wanted to reed the menu and decide between stake and lobster. “I think thistle bee good,” she said, pointing too the lobster.

Clarence got down on won knee and held out a wring. “Wheel ewe merry me?” he asked.
“Know, I don’t think sew,” Doreen replied. “I’m knot interested, butt aisle let ewe by me diner.”


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The Cranky Language Lady: Wednesday Grammar Quiz for Grownups

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Grammar Quiz #29: Common Errors

When others discount or dismiss your writing, it’s often because you have misused some common words. Many people view the correct use of these words as a sign that you know what you’re doing. Unfortunately, anyone can slip up, even an excellent writer, so it pays to be careful. Can you find the eight errors in the passage below?



Its a happy day for teachers when a school opens its doors and lets the kids out for the summer. Its a happy day for the kids, too. They kick up there heels and rejoice that there going to have a couple of months of freedom. Its not such a happy day for there parents, however. They brace theirselves for a lot of “There is nothing to do!” comments, along with questions like, “Can you take me to the mall?” and, “Can you take me to Ashley’s house?” There is no summertime peace for parents, only for teachers—unless, of course, the teachers have there own kids.


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The Cranky Language Lady: Wednesday Grammar Quiz for Grownups

The Cranky Language Lady: Wednesday Grammar Quiz for Grownups comes from CrankyLanguageLady.com. To find out more about the Cranky Language Lady, view sample pages from her new book, peruse her blog, or visit the website.

Grammar Quiz #28: Agreement

Can you find the five errors in agreement in the following selection?


Each of the twenty-seven cows standing in the middle of the country road were calmly looking around, not at all perturbed by Blake’s Mercedes and all the honking and yelling going on. “This bunch of cows that won’t get out of the road are stupid!” he shouted.


“It’s called a herd,” his girlfriend Alicia commented mildly, “a herd of cattle not a bunch of cows.”
Blake shot her a dirty look. “Okay, each of the cows in the herd of cattle standing there blocking the road should get their act together and move out of our way!"


"Perhaps if you asked them nicely,” Alicia answered. “Neither a person nor a cow like to be yelled at.” With that, she got out of the car and patted a black and white heifer on the rump. “Move along, sweetie,” she said, “and ask your friends to scoot to the side, please.”


To Blake’s astonishment, the road suddenly cleared. “I guess I should call you the Cow Whisperer,” he said, in awe.


“Every woman in the universe has their own special talents,” she smiled.



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The Cranky Language Lady: Wednesday Grammar Quiz for Grownups

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Grammar Quiz #27: Spotting Common Errors

The passage below has five problems. Can you find them and fix them?



“How about these one’s here?” asked the clerk, her nose stud flashing fetchingly under the fluorescent lights as she pointed to a selection of socks. All of the sudden, Byron was smitten.


“Um…,” he said, mentally smacking himself in the head for his inability to form a coherent sentence.


His friend Jake came to the rescue. “He needs to think about it. Me and him will be back later.”
“Definately,” Byron managed to say, gazing at the clerk with starry eyes.

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The Cranky Language Lady: Wednesday Grammar Quiz for Grownups

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Grammar Quiz #27: Spotting and Correcting Wrong Words

Can you spot and correct the two problem words in this entry?


Nathan really wanted his white shirts hung on white hangers, his blue shirts hung on blue hangers, and his green shirts hung on green hangers. He could of told his wife that, but he was afraid she might stop doing his laundry. After all, he remembered how she use to make him breakfast every morning, until he suggested that he really preferred the butter on his toast to go completely to the edges of the bread.


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The Cranky Language Lady: Wednesday Grammar Quiz for Grownups

The Cranky Language Lady: Wednesday Grammar Quiz for Grownups comes from CrankyLanguageLady.com. To find out more about the Cranky Language Lady, view sample pages from her new book, peruse her blog, or visit the website.

Grammar Quiz #16 — Semicolon Savvy

To many, semicolons are the most mysterious of punctuation marks. Check your semicolon savvy by correcting the following:

Rita couldn’t believe it; she had dropped her cell phone into the toilet yet again. She had spent a lot of money on cell phones in the past year; $953.00, to be exact.

She sighed. She had three options; to give up using a cell phone altogether, to fish the cell phone out, wash it off, and pray for a miracle, or to suggest to her husband, perhaps after an especially nice home-cooked meal, that he might want to be gracious about the money they were going to have to pay Verizon, yet again.

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The Cranky Language Lady: Wednesday Grammar Quiz for Grownups

The Cranky Language Lady: Wednesday Grammar Quiz for Grownups comes from CrankyLanguageLady.com. To find out more about the Cranky Language Lady, view sample pages from her new book, peruse her blog, or visit the website.

Grammar Quiz #14 — Puffy Prose Onstage

People often write in a wordy, stilted, formal style because they think that’s how they should write. Good writing, however, is usually clear and to the point. The paragraph below is full of empty or needless phrases. See if you can pare it down to around 70 words (instead of 131), without losing any meaning.



The board members of the theater have assessed the situation and decided that, at this point in time, another original show by Edgar Wharton would not be in the theater’s best interests, primarily because of the fact that ticket sales for his previous show, My Life as an Accountant, did not reach anywhere near a level that could be considered even marginally acceptable. Possible potential revenue from Stock Options and Derivatives—the Musical does not appear likely to allow the theater to pay for even the associated costs of producing the show. As a result, the board, as a whole, has determined that The Sound of Music would, when all is said and done, represent a choice that would be more acceptable with the public at large for the next show.



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The Cranky Language Lady: Wednesday Grammar Quiz for Grownups

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Grammar Quiz #14 — Picnic and Passive Voice

Sentences that use active voice are generally clearer and more concise than sentences that use passive voice. With active voice, the subject of the sentence performs the action of the verb, rather than receiving it.


Rewrite the paragraph below so that all the sentences are in active voice.


The family members planning to attend the Fogarty family reunion were notified at the last minute by Aunt Amelia that they should not come. The fruit salad had been nibbled on by squirrels, and the potato chips had been soaked by a sprinkler accidentally turned on by Uncle Orville. Worse, the picnic table had been set on fire by little Orville, Jr., when a spark caught on the paper tablecloth. The flames had been noticed by the neighbors, and the fire department had been called. Aunt Amelia’s mood had not been improved when a lecture was given to her and Uncle Orville about the importance of teaching children not to play with matches.


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The Cranky Language Lady: Wednesday Grammar Quiz for Grownups

The Cranky Language Lady: Wednesday Grammar Quiz for Grownups comes from CrankyLanguageLady.com. To find out more about the Cranky Language Lady, view sample pages from her new book, peruse her blog, or visit the website.

Grammar Quiz #13 — Apostrophes and Motherhood

Correct the following:

Charla didn't know what to do, her twin's birthday fell on the same day as her weekly night out with her girlfriends'. She hesitated but decided the twin's would understand that she needed time for herself. After all they were soon going to be four year's old.

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The Cranky Language Lady: Wednesday Grammar Quiz for Grownups

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Grammar Quiz #11 — Commas and Vampires

Correct the following:

Well Diana tried to read Twilight but when she found herself counting how many times some form of the word “smolder” occured on each page she gave up. "The Twilight saga's translation rights have been sold in nearly 50 countries, and 116 million copies have been sold worldwide." It may have a lot of fans, but she is not one of them. Maybe she's just not a Vampire kinda person.

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The Cranky Language Lady: Wednesday Grammar Quiz for Grownups

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Grammar Quiz #10—Dependent Clauses and Good Drivers

This week’s quiz contains only one error, but it occurs more than once. Can you find it?

Because he’s never had an accident, Doug insists that he is a great driver. His wife insists that he’s never had an accident, because he’s just plain lucky. His children insist that he’s never had an accident, because people see him coming and drive like crazy to get out of his way.

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The Cranky Language Lady: Wednesday Grammar Quiz for Grownups

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Grammar Quiz #8—Word choice and indulgent parents

Correct the following:

“I’m sorry,” said Patricia, “but my husband and I definately won’t be paying for the damage to your living room. We feel badly about what little Jeremy did, but no reasonable adult would ever own a white sofa and lamps that are breakable.”

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The Cranky Language Lady: Wednesday Grammar Quiz for Grownups

To start off the New Year right, Prestwick House will be syndicating the weekly Wednesday Grammar Quiz for Grownups from the lovely folks at CrankyLanguageLady.com. Don't let the "cranky" in their title scare you away. With a sense of humor, clarity, and only occasional crankiness, Cranky Language Lady is a great source for tips and products for writers, would-be writers, and those who simply need a little help with writing.

To find out more about the Cranky Language Lady, view sample pages from her new book, peruse her blog, or visit www.CrankyLanguageLady.com.

Wednesday Grammar Quiz for Grownups

Correct the following:

Erin literally died of embarrassment when she tripped and fell during the talent portion of the beauty contest. LaVerne on the other hand was literally turning cartwheels when she one the evening gown competition, and Julianna was literally bursting with pride when she one the swim suit competition.

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Correct the following:

For my first dinner party, I’m going to serve: prime rib, baked potatos with sour cream, creamed asparagus, and hot fudge sundays with whip creme,” Elaina wrote to her mother in an e-mail message.

See a possible correction and explanation.